belated musings on turning 26

I realized this morning that I hadn't blogged about turning 26 yet, and the month of March is coming to an end. It made me think of how I spent my 25th year, and sadly I was drawing up blanks. I couldn't think of any personal milestones that set this year apart, and all I could think about was a rundown of work-related events that happened in the year.

Add to that today's quote in my Don't Sweat the Small Stuff calendar: 

"When someone asks you how you are, don't emphasize how busy you are. You're an interesting person with many other qualities besides busyness."

For the most part of 2008,  I think I have been guilty of responding to the question "How are you?" with either, "Stressed out..." or "Tired...", both statements punctuated with a heavy sigh. Somehow, work became a massive force that sucked out all my energy, leaving life to just happen within the smallest cracks and crevices. The rest of my life became little moments that got me through each day with my sanity intact.

I was prepared to accept that Year 25 just came and went, almost as though it never existed, when I realized that there was an underlying theme to the year after all: CHANGE.

Year 25 was a year of transitions, of saying goodbye to people I'd known for a while, and hello to people who would make a mark in my life. In 2008 alone, I've had to say...

... goodbye to the two girls in my team whose unique brands of craziness I will always remember and look back to with a big smile. 

... hello to the boss we had waited a year for, and found that she was not only a great mentor, but also a great friend and fellow book hoarder lover.

... hello to one girl who I found soooo incredibly loud and maybe even boisterous, but whose stories and antics I missed once she was gone.

... hello and goodbye to someone whom I first considered a mentor, and ended up considering a good friend.

... hello to one girl who was mysterious and quiet, yet opened up so much towards the end that I've found myself wondering how she's doing now that she's no longer with our team. 

... hello to one girl who is just so bright and bubbly, her optimism and enthusiasm is infectious. She brings such a positive energy to the team, and I feel good to have her around.

... goodbye to one girl who has so much potential, I'm glad that she's finally where she's meant to be.

In terms of work, this was when my area of responsibilities changed and mutated until an entirely new system was implemented. I finally began to explore taking on writing racket, and realized after three years that it could be done after all.

It was the year I "formalized" (in quotes because we didn't exactly formalize it in the "Will you be my girlfriend?" way and we don't celebrate any particular date) my relationship with the most caring, loving, patient, understanding, funny, strong, and trustworthy man I know-- aside from my dad, of course. And I've never been happier to be called a "girlfriend" again.

And finally, it was the year I noticed little changes within me, maybe brought upon by age. It may not be obvious as I continue to attack everything at break-neck speed, but I've slowed down: I think before I speak, I've learned when to hold my tongue, I take deep breaths and let petty concerns go, I let people finish telling a joke even if I've heard it before (and I still laugh as if hearing it for the first time), I resist the temptation to slam things around when I'm angry, I try to listen harder, I ask more questions, I try to smile more often. Yes, I may still have road rage and my occasional outbursts, but for the most part, I think I've mellowed.

Now, I'm on Year 26. Who knows what this year will bring? The only thing I hope for is that I continue to grow in love-- love my family, friends, and boyfriend, love my job, love myself, love life.

Here's to a great year ahead!

right on the money

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:

You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

for once, i rooted for the cheaters

And this is the book that made me do it.

Anticipating a long wait at my dentist's office, I brought along Something Borrowed by Emily Giffin. I figured getting absorbed in chick lit would be better than falling asleep in public, as I had done the last time. It was just supposed to be a way for me to pass the time, and I didn't really intend on spending the rest of my Saturday night reading.

But that's exactly what I did. After waiting for an hour and a half, I was so drawn in by this book that I couldn't put it down. I stayed up until 12:30pm, reading it until the very end. Even after reading, I found myself still thinking about it.

What does this have to do with cheaters, you ask? Well, the protagonist is goody-two-shoes Rachel, who has always played second fiddle to her best friend Darcy. Okay, fine, maybe I identify with Rachel because we're both rule players and seek approval from almost everybody, but I really hated Darcy-- selfish, "It's always about me" Darcy, who always screwed over Rachel and always made her feel bad. She stole Rachel's first love. She lied about her SAT scores just so she could be ten points higher than Rachel. She made Rachel believe that she had gotten into Notre Dame --Rachel's dream college-- when Rachel didn't. She led a glamorous life while Rachel was stuck hating her job. And most importantly, she got the guy that Rachel always thought was out of her league: Dex, who Rachel met in law school. After convincing herself that he wouldn't go for a girl like her, she promptly introduced him to Darcy. The pair is engaged, and Rachel is set to be the maid of honor in their wedding.

I hate Darcy so much that when a drunken Rachel and Dex sleep together on the night of her thirtieth birthday, I find myself hoping that Rachel gets her chance to screw over Darcy. That this time, she comes out on top, even if she is the maid of honor screwing her best friend's fiance. I hate cheaters because I always wonder about the girlfriend who is clueless about all these things happening behind her back. But here, I cannot bring myself to sympathize with Darcy as the clueless girlfriend. For me, it serves her right for being a terrible friend to Rachel.

Of course, this isn't an open and shut case. Dex loves Darcy. Rachel loves Darcy and values their 20-year friendship. Will they realize that Darcy is too important for them both to lose, or is what they have much more precious than they think? For chick lit critics, this isn't as brainless as one would think. I truly enjoyed this book from cover to cover, and find myself wanting to reread it on a lazy afternoon.

And a quick mention on the latest additions to my reading list:

I mentioned this book a long time ago on my Plurk, and I can't even remember how I found out about it. All I know is I was intrigued by the anecdote that gives birth to the title. The subtitle "The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation" has caused friends to say, "This book is so you!" I kept it at the back of my mind, yet found myself always returning to the English Reference section of the bookstore in our neighborhood mall, checking to see if the lone copy had disappeared.

Finding an open copy in another bookstore sealed its fate for me. The introduction spoke to me by giving an example of a badly-punctuated poster, followed by the statement, "If this didn't bother you, put down this book right now." I wanted to raise my hand and say, "Me, me, it bothered ME!!!" I put it back down, couldn't stop thinking about it for days, and finally put the lone copy out of its misery by buying it from said bookstore.

To be fair to the other books that made it to my Reading List first, I have not gone past the first chapter, which I read while having dinner alone immediately after buying it. Hey, I needed to pass the time!

I admit: this was an impulse buy. But in my defense, when you pick up a book with a boring title like Raising the Peaceable Kingdom, you don't expect it to be about an interesting experiment: what happens when you put a baby chick, a puppy, a kitten, a baby rabbit, and a baby rat all together? Do they end up hating each other, or do they live together peacefully even if they're completely different species?

I found myself reading the first chapter while standing next to the Sale Books bin, and I realized that I really wanted to find out the results of this experiment. Wouldn't the puppy and kitten be at each other's throats immediately? After all, the idiom "fighting like cats and dogs" had to come from somewhere. Wouldn't the kitten eat the rat, just like Tom always chases after Jerry (then again, I think Jerry is a mouse, not a rat, but still)? And the kitten might eat the baby chick, just as Sylvester always lusts after Tweety Bird. I couldn't resist not knowing, so it's a good thing that it would only cost me P65 to find out.

And so my current reading list reads:

The 2009 Reading List

1. The Other Boleyn Girl by Philippa Gregory
2. The Smart One and the Pretty One by Claire LaZebnik
3. Skinny Bitch by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin --I boycotted this one.
4. A Place Called Here by Cecelia Ahern
5. If You Could See Me Now by Cecelia Ahern
6. Like Water For Chocolate by Laura Esquivel
7. Ready for Anything: 52 Productivity Principles for Getting Things Done by David Allen
8. The Amber Room by Steve Berry
9. Doctors by Erich Segal
10. Something Borrowed by Emily Giffin
11. Freakonomics by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner
12. Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason by Helen Fielding
13. Prizes by Erich Segal

14. Live a Little by Kim Green

15. Eats, Shoots and Leaves by Lynne Truss

16. Raising the Peaceable Kingdom by Jeffrey Maoussaieff Mason

Hey, 5 out of 16 books, that's not so bad! It means I'm one-third down my reading list, as long as I don't add to it! Maybe I'll read Like Water for Chocolate next.

Happy Sunday, everyone!

The Health Reasons Diet

Health is something you take for granted in your youth.

In short, I feel old. I've been feeling this way for quite some time now, like every time I start yawning when the clock strikes 10:30pm, or when I think to myself that my siblings will turn deaf by the time they reach my age if they keep listening to their sounds at that volume. But I finally have proof that, indeed, my age has caught up to me.

I had dinner with my cousin last week at Jack's Loft and ordered my usual pasta meal: penne in tomato cream sauce. It was a Monday night and it had been a stressful day, so when she said, "I think I'll get a drink," I decided what the heck, I'd get a cocktail too. So I ordered my usual cocktail, a tequila sunrise. We had a pleasant chat over dinner, I felt slightly buzzed from the drink, but nothing I couldn't handle.

Until 3 A.M. rolled in and I found myself heaving into the toilet bowl, leaning against it as if it was my best friend. Actually, we did become best friends because I found myself hanging out with it four more times that day, even if I could heave no more. All the while I thought to myself, "I am never drinking again!" I went so far as to take a two-hour nap in the office's clinic, hoping I could sleep off the hangover.

I knew it wasn't a hangover when I ran a fever, had to go home, and couldn't eat a thing. I knew for sure it wasn't a hangover when, the next day, I still couldn't eat and was feeling nauseated even after naps. So the next day, I went to see the doctor, and after a long line of questioning, he finally told me, "It seems like you have a gastroesophageal reflux disease, or GERD."

Say what?? The only way I could explain it was in comparison to hyperacidity: if hyperacidity is when your stomach produces too much acid, this GERD means my body expels the acid, usually by belching and you can generally taste something acidic near the throat. Once he said that, I realized he was right. And I thought my constant burping after meals was normal-- apparently, that was the acid reflux in action.

As a consequence, I now have to make changes in my lifestyle and diet. No skipping meals-- even if I don't skip meals, I do have a tendency of eating very late. Lunch at almost 2PM, dinner at 10PM. None of that now. I also have to eat something every two to three hours, even if it's just crackers.

Best of all, I have to avoid the following, as they stimulate acid production in the body: caffeine, milk, softdrinks, alcoholic beverages, acidic and spicy foods. The doctor says I can still take them, as long as I've eaten a real meal before doing so, but I can't have them frequently. In any case, I'm still choosing to avoid them because I noticed that since I obeyed my doctor's orders, the condition seems to be more under control. I keep drinking water now, and I have crackers with me at all times, and I'm realizing that I don't need caffeine and sweets to function. Now if I lose some weight in the process, that would be great!

Oh, and with that list, I figured out what happened to me on Monday night: it turns out that tomato is considered acidic food, and partnered with the alcohol, it was a double whammy and my acid-producers probably went wild. It made me realize that when I was younger, I never thought of these things, how the things I ate could be the cause of a real illness and not just an upset stomach. Controlling my diet seemed like something I would do in mid-life, not quarter-life. But I guess there's no age limit to being healthy and taking care of your body.

Lesson learned? There's no day like today to start eating on time, getting enough sleep, and turning down the volume of the stereo!

Why I made a new Multiply site

It all started with a story that I told my mom about a woman who found out through Facebook that her husband wanted a divorce. Since she doesn't have Facebook, I had to preface the story with an explanation of how Facebook alerts you over the slightest changes in someone's account. She tsked-tsked over the story and said, "That's why I don't like all those sites, like Livejournal and Facebook and Multiply. People end up knowing about things they're not supposed to know about."

I thought that was the end of it, but she continued to tell me about something I had written in my Multiply site two years ago. It was one of my random musings about money, and I guess I must have said something about the way some parents obligate their children to contribute to the household so much, they're unable to start saving up for their own future. I've been lucky enough that my parents don't ask me to contribute to household expenses, and that they would probably rather I save up for myself and my own expenses. I know that others my age are not as lucky. But that's not the point. The point is, apparently, an uncle of mine read it, and all this time assumed that I was talking about my own household, griping about my own parents. It really ticked me off how he could assume things about my life because, frankly, it's none of his business. I also discovered that he really does check my site whenever I upload something new, and it bugs me that he seems so interested in my life. (It doesn't help that I've had my gripes about this uncle on separate occassions.)

Realizing that I didn't want this uncle, his wife and their kids (even if they keep separate Multiply accounts, they do still live in the same house) to have access to my personal life, I decided to log on to my Multiply account and try to find a way to filter my contacts. There must be a way to edit him out without deleting him/them because that would be too obvious-- what happens in the next family reunion and he says, "Oh, why am I not seeing you on Multiply anymore?" What am I supposed to say then?

I discovered that Multiply is not filter-friendly. While it recognizes that relationships vary in degree (it does allow you to classify your relationship with someone as a neighbor, classmate, or sorority sister), when it comes to allowing access to your friends, it only lumps those subtle distinctions into the general Friends category. Which means that if I decide to filter an album and make it unavailable to Family (including that uncle), it means that my cousins and sister cannot see it either. Yes, I could select particular individuals that will have access to that album, but I find it too tedious to run through my entire Multiply list. Aside from that uncle, I realized that there are so many people on my list who were just my classmates in one subject, high school classmates I wasn't really close to, and old friends I haven't heard from in a very, very long time. And when these people post things, I don't open their albums anyway because, quite honestly, I'm really not that interested in what they're up to.

That's when I realized that I really should've taken Multiply seriously when they said "This is a site for meaningful relationships." So I decided to open a new site and invite only the people that I really want to let into my life. Letting the whole world know about what's going on in your life really does not appeal to me, and that's the downside to these online networking sites. I like Facebook, I like Multiply, I like Plurk, and I like Blogger (if I didn't, this blog wouldn't be alive), but there is always a risk of oversharing in these sites. What I've learned as I've gotten older is that you must straddle a line between putting your thoughts out there and putting every single thought (including how you can still taste your lunch every time you burp and now you need to go pee-pee) out there. Share, but don't overshare, and learn to share with the right people.

I'm still keeping the old one though, but now it has a new purpose. After all, I'm still uploading links to my press releases as they appear on the Philippine Entertainment Portal (PEP.ph) and I sometimes still make blog entries that are work-related. Besides, that site has all my contacts for online shopping as well, so I can somehow look at it as a "professional" site, as opposed to my new "personal" site.

Now I must begin the slow and steady effort of building my new site.

Spotlight: "Freakonomics" and "Live a Little"

Currently reading.
I don't know why I delayed reading this book for so long. A fellow book hoarder lover gave this to me for Christmas 2007, and it somehow got lost in the pile of all my books. I rediscovered it, added it to my reading list, and finally decided to start on it since it had already waited so long to be read.

I now regret delaying it. Freakonomics is one of the most interesting things I've read in a while. It's non-fiction, which is a good break from all the fiction I've been reading. But it's a little hard to explain what it's about. Steven Levitt is an economist but a very creative thinker at the same time. I used to hate economics classes because they all seemed so technical-- though in high school, I remember thinking that economics was an easy subject that teachers just like to complicate. There's a lot of logic involved in understanding economics and its basic principles like supply and demand (which is probably the only thing I ever learned of the subject). Levitt applies the same logic needed to understand economics into unearthing the truth behind many other things. How is legalized abortion connected to the crime rate decline in the US? What makes teachers cheat? (Yes, teachers. Not students.) How did one man bring down the Klu Klux Klan? Levitt is able to present data in a way that is not boring at all-- they just seem like important elements to understanding a story. I'm only in the second (or is it third?) chapter, so I'm sure that there's still so much more to learn from this book. It just really appeals to my Connect-the-Dots sensibilities.


The latest addition to my reading list. Yes, I'm fully aware that I currently have 13 books on my reading list, but I couldn't resist this one.

I have a confession. On days when I have nothing better to do, I browse the websites of Fully Booked and Powerbooks and look for interesting reads. If I find a title I like, I log on to Amazon and read reviews. I found this book on one of those days.

The premise intrigued me. A housewife neglected by her husband and taken for granted by her bratty teenagers is diagnosed with breast cancer. All of a sudden, her family is being very appreciative of her, they treat her really well-- basically behavior you would expect from people who know that you're on the brink of death. So she's loving all the attention, when her doctor suddenly tells her, "Oh, sorry, we made a mistake. You don't have cancer after all." What does she do? She doesn't tell her family that she doesn't have cancer. Why should she, when they're finally treating her well? This makes me wonder where the book will go. Will someone discover that she's not sick after all? Will she eventually have to break the news to them? Will there be a twist that has her dying by accident in the end? What, pray tell, happens when you let your family think that you're dying? Do you actually get the chance to, ironically, live a little? (Yes, I figured out the story behind the title!)

So on my next trip to Fully Booked, I tracked it down and just made a mental note to consider it for my list. This went on for months-- I'd be in Fully Booked High Street, I'd see one copy lying there, I'd walk away, strangely comforted by the fact that it was still there. Finally, when I went to Fully Booked High Street this week, I checked it out and read the first chapter. Lo and behold, it was actually funny! Realizing that this wasn't a somber book and I was probably going to be in for a few laughs, plus that lone copy had been sitting there for months (okay, maybe it's not the same copy, but I've always just seen one copy in all these months), I finally decided to buy it.

I can't wait to keep reading Freakonomics this weekend! And I'm glad I have Live a Little waiting in the wings. :)

pushing daisies in a place called Here

An update on my reading list:

The 2009 Reading List

1. The Other Boleyn Girl by Philippa Gregory

2. The Smart One and the Pretty One by Claire LaZebnik

3. Skinny Bitch by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin

4. A Place Called Hereby Cecelia Ahern

5. If You Could See Me Now by Cecelia Ahern

6. Like Water For Chocolate by Laura Esquivel

7. Ready for Anything: 52 Productivity Principles for Getting Things Done by David Allen

8. The Amber Room by Steve Berry

9. Doctors by Erich Segal

10. Something Borrowed by Emily Giffin

11. Freakonomics by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner

12. Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason by Helen Fielding

13. Prizes by Erich Segal

I stopped reading Skinny Bitch because I disagreed that you need to be a vegetarian to become healthy. I started reading A Place Called Here in the car while waiting for parking, but the book was pretty good so I ended up taking it out of the car and reading it a few chapters a night for the whole week.

The premise is actually pretty good. When Sandy Shortt was ten years old, a classmate went missing and was never found. This made her obsessed with lost things, literally turning the house upside down in search of a sock or a toothbrush or anything that went missing. She dedicated her adult life to searching for missing persons, until one day, she goes missing herself. She finds herself in a place where all the lost things go-- including some of the 

lost people she'd spent years trying to find. There is a whole other life in this place, as people try to go on with their lives, building families and taking on jobs, working together as a community. But Sandy only wants to go home. The question is, how?

I'm thinking I should probably read something lighter now, like maybe Something Borrowed by Emily Giffin. If I do that though, I'll be left with much heavier stuff to tackle. So I dunno, I'll think about it. Maybe I'll pause on the reading for a while and resume watching Pushing Daisies. It's a pretty interesting series about a guy who has the power to bring people back to live for just one minute. After that, he has to touch them again so that they become dead again-- otherwise, something else must die in its place. It sounds morbid, but it's actually got some dry humor. Plus, I love that the colors are very vivid. It actually reminds me of a movie, but I can't quite figure out what. Maybe Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (Johnny Depp version)? Everything is so vibrant, and the voiceover adds a fairytale-like quality to it. I only have Season 1, and I heard that the series will end with Season 2, but maybe that's just right. The story might get ruined if they let it drag on too long.

Wow! This marks the first time my blog actually has pictures! Hooray! :) Signing off for now. :)